14 Responses to “Food Fight – Your Responses”

• Dear Father:

  I appreciate your reply. In fact I am embarrassed at the length of your reply.

  I absolutely agree about staying at the table, and I have reapplied to the web site. You are right. And that is something I have appreciated in President Obama’s speeches: that he will listen even harder to those his disagrees with.

  I want to assure you I was not hurt or offended in any way by your words, except perhaps a certain frustration with reading the strong words about the President. As I may have said from our perspective we watched eight years of Republican government in which so much of the political rhetoric had to do with family value and a resistance to abortion. And the conservative religious movements seemed to be using political means, i.e. lobbying, direct comments on what legislators were saying and mass rallies, to make their point. And their point seemed to be that legislation could be passed that would apply to all Americans regardless of what their own personal views were. That appeared counter productive to what the American experiment is. At the same time as this effort was on going, economic decisions and military decisions were being made that greatly widened the gap between the very rich and the poor. The economic trials that the whole world is facing have a very Made in America aspect to them which the government could have mitigated had it had a less lasser faire approach to economics.

  I’m not at all sure I can see your claim that you are speaking of morals and not of politics. I understand that abortion is a moral issue. I agree, for what it’s worth (my opinion, I mean) that abortion is wrong. I agree that we live in an alarmingly permissive society. And I absolutely agree that even something as simple as eating every dinner together and rooting that meal in gratitude makes a huge difference in family and society.

  Where I see that we differ in the tone of your criticism of the President. I still feel the tone implies that the President is not speaking honestly: he is not ferocious, he is not anti-life and he is not shameful. That is what I mean by rhetoric that does not promote a helpful and healthy approach to the problem and to all the other problems that feed it. I just don’t get your point that you are not being political in your moral concerns. When you over simplify and underreport the President’s words you are being every bit as political as you are saying he is.

  I expect you have read the President’s writings, particularly the Audacity of Hope. I think he does a marvelous job of trying to understand the modern American democracy as it includes the realities of faith and of family. I wish we had Canadian politicians who had the courage and the ability to think so well of how a democracy can serve all the interests.

  So, no issue what so ever with your approach or your concern with abortion. But I still feel you are naïve in your distinction between politics and morality: they can’t be separated.

  Fr R.

  Eastern Canada

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:08 pm.

• Dear Rev. M:

  Greetings in Christ’s Peace!

  I received your email last week. First of all, thanks for your honesty. I really do appreciate your words, suggestions and the complimentary encouragement at the end of your email.

  Secondly, I want to express my sincere apologies if my words hurt you in any way. While I have the responsibility to address the greatest moral issue of the day, I also have the responsibility to say it with Christ-like charity. If I did not do that, please forgive me. If you have suggestions on how to say what I said better, please don’t hesitate to let me know.

  Your response highlights something important to me as a writer: I obviously did not communicate my message very well. I obviously failed to help others see the connection between the civil rights march and the pro-life march. Also, my disagreement with the President’s position on using American Tax Money to fund international abortions was obviously something that offended you. I never meant for strong disagreement to mean the same thing as a divisive spirit, which you obviously sensed. Again, for that I’m sorry.

  You clearly thought I was taking a political position. Please know that was not my intent. I was trying to make a Moral Argument to encourage action. This topic is above politics. I would oppose any Republican, Democrat, or Green party who wants to use tax payers money to fund abortions. Further, you assumed my rhetoric – albeit strong – was “divisive.” But I must ask, since when did disagreeing with someone become divisive?

  You also presented a position about unsafe abortion mills of the past. While the abortion offices are now much cleaner and more professional, a zebra can’t change it stripes. Abortion is still the killing of an inncocent baby. I would never want a woman to go through something so tragic as not having truly safe alternatives. But after counseling many women (and men who paid for abortions), I realize that there is nothing “safe” about abortions at all, no matter how clearn the offices are. We are being fed lies from an industry that promotes sexuality without resopnsibility. Contrary to what some new agencies may report, abortions are not decreasing, especially since they are paid for by people who oppose it. Please don’t disregard the real statistics. The majority of abortions is committed out of convenience not “emergencies.” Our country and our Churces must provide real options for women to bring the life of a child into this world. Even though it is a hard world, each child conceived gives us hope. Just ask Mary. Just ask Mrs. Obama.

  In last week’s email blast I raised the issues your wrote about. I felt strongly enough to write about it as well as to respond to you more personally. That’s the “miracle” of internet. The number of responses I received from my email last week have been overwhelming! I’m encouraged by the numbers of people who read these positions – no matter how challenging.

  In the email I wrote about making sure that families not walk away from the table or the discussion. The Table is a place where conversations can occur. While I completely respect your decision to unsubscribe, I also encouraged my readers and their families to not walk away from the table. In my family, we make sure that we talk things out – no matter how difficult. In our sacred tradition, the “table” is such an important place: we are nourished and from it we grow.

  I sincerely pray that dialogue about the VERY IMPORTANT issues can be discussed in a forum of honesty and truth. If I was disrespectful, rude, divisive, ignorant, arrogant or mean, please forgive me. And, please help me to be a better representative to our God who gives us Life. And, if you ever want to continue this dialogue, please know that I would be honored to discuss this matter with you.

  Recently, I was at a conference and met a Catholic Bishop from Canada. I’ve done retreats and presentations in that area. This Bishop invited me to his diocese to do something for his people there. If it is ear your area, I would be very pleased to meet you.

  In the meantime, please, let us pray for each other.

  Peace!

  Fr. Leo

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:10 pm.

• Fr. Leo,

  I just wanted to take a few minutes to thank you for the pro-life message you sent in your last Grace Before Meals E-mail. I am sorry that some do not like to hear it, and I understand your wanting to find a way to say the message without hurting anyone.

  We have met before, but I don’t know if you remember me or my family. My husband, Dan, and I have a handicapped son, Andy. Andy is now 20 years old. He is mentally and physically handicapped, and he cannot talk, and is losing his ability to walk. Andy is a happy guy most of the time, and enjoys life. Sometimes he sees angels, I’m sure of it. He cannot speak for himself, to ask for life. As “broken” as he seems, God still uses him to reach the hearts of others. It is one of those mysteries that only God can understand, and yet I see how God can use him all the time. I have had people come up to me and say how much love they can see in us. I have found someone crying with their head in his lap. As limited as Andy is – when he met a visiting priest from Africa years ago, his little soul seemed to know him as a priest of God, far from home, and he reached for him and gave him a big hug. He never does this; in fact he rarely shows anyone new any attention at all. He rarely even looks at a person directly to their face. Another time, when we were at the funeral of one of Andy’s classmates, he reached out to hug the mother of the dead child, and fill her empty arms. Somehow, he can feel the need of other people, and reach out to them, in ways that I cannot understand.

  We are blessed to have been given this perfect soul into our care. He is “broken” in such a way that he is perfect for God’s use. What if I had chosen abortion for him, to “spare” him his challenging life? Worse yet, what if I had chosen abortion for his little sister, whom I was told would suffer the same fate as him? (she is 18 now, perfectly fine, attending Archbishop Spalding, on the honor roll, and will graduate high school this year!)

  The pro-abortion, pro-death agenda is a direct attack on Andy’s life. If we can stand by and let someone like Terry Schiavo die, as far as I’m concerned my son is next. He certainly appears to have no worth to closed-minded people. And they will never understand his value unless they can look past the drool, the wheelchair, and the spastic muscles. Most adults try hard not to see Andy, and it is their loss. Interestingly enough, most children are very intrigued by him, until their parents turn their heads away. And some, through the Grace of God, are able to see him as he is, a perfect soul disguised in a less-than-perfect body.

  There is more at stake here than just unborn children. Perhaps that is a way of letting people know that the culture of death has got to go. Who is broken enough to not deserve to live? Where do we draw the line? I heard once of a family who gave up their handicapped son for adoption. The siblings, who were perfectly healthy, expressed a concern that if they broke an arm or a leg, or were hurt in some way – would their parents still want them? Just who is handicapped enough or unwanted enough to have to die? We are beginning to think like Hitler, and it’s a sorry state of affairs. There can be no compromise. Every soul deserves life, from conception to natural death.

  So, thank you for defending life.

  ULTREYA!

  Debbie M.

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:11 pm.

• Fr. Leo… I too am torn. While I personally believe your stance, that abortion, in all instances, is unacceptable, I also see what I would interpret your friend’s message to be. I would hate for a ban on abortion to lead women to even riskier options.

  It seems to me, however, that the other subscriber expressed more concern over a more “anti-Obama” sentiment, which, though probably not the intent of your blast, could have been interpreted as such. To that end, his response to your blast may have been focused on an issue that was fundamentally different from yours. While your blast was clearly focused on the pro-life issue, he seems to have focused on the need for unity around the world. (A unification that I do not feel is impossible, even with the pro-choice/pro-life debate.)

  My conflict is this… I support the pro-life stance and I also support Obama (though possibly not every Obama policy). This, however, is, in my opinion, at the very foundation of our democratic society. The freedom to disagree. In fact, through this disagreement with our elected officials and/or policy, we are, in fact, being even MORE supportive of our government — a government that was established to provide the forum for such disagreement.

  One thing that stuck me about Obama when listening to his debates and pre-election interviews, was his response to the issue of abortion when it was raised. He commented that, while he was not in favor of governmental control over the right to choose, in fact, “no one is pro-abortion.” The governmental debate is purely over whether it is the right of the government versus the right of the individual to make the decision. For me, personally it is a moot point, as whether the government would ban abortion or the choice was left to me, the choice for life would be the same.

  Just a thought. Thank you for doing what you do and for spreading the message of the importance of the family. As a teacher, I see every day the important role that family plays in the lives of our children and the grave disservice done to our kids when that key element is neglected. Thank you. (And don’t worry… I won’t unsubscribe, even if I disagee… especially if I disagree. I enjoy the discussion at the table!)

  –
  Steve

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:14 pm.

• have written to you before. You may recall that I told you who much I love your weekly emails andshare them far and wide. You may also recall that I am an Episcopalian and that I have used some of your material with the homeless I minister to. You may also recall that I am gay and once wrote you a very long email asking your thoughts and opinions of gay people within the Church. All of that is still true. I also want to say that I totally support the way in which you write and applaud that you preach what Our Lord has sent you to preach. Every human has the right to life and I am saddened when folks even think about abortion. Thank you for being a voice for those who yet have no voice. I’m sure you are sad that the clergyman unsubscribed, but some folks run from difficulties and some face them. Thank God you continue to face them!

  Michael

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:15 pm.

• Hi Fr. Leo,

  I just got your email today about the clergy person from another country being upset with what you said last week and I had to go back to read last weeks because I didn’t remember it being harsh, or wrong, or anything. I still feel that way! You said it very truthfully. That’s the problem with our culture. Not to sound like Tom Cruise not being able to handle the truth, but that is the problem. We can’t handle the truth and when it is put in our faces we walk away. People don’t want to be held accountable. It’s like our politicians think by saying, “Deciding when life becomes life is above me,” that they won’t be held accountable… and I believe they have said it so much, they actually believe it now. Scientists have proven when life begins…

  Don’t you just wish they could all take biology again?

  Anyway, I have rambled too much, but I completely support you and your Grace Before meals family. I LOVE reading your emails every week. You are a wonderful priest who is not afraid to speak the truth. And even Jesus had followers who didn’t believe him and left… We’ll pray for that clergy person to realize the truth.

  God bless you and all you do!

  Amy

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:16 pm.

• Father Leo – I admire your courage to stand up for the truth. Bravo!

  The truth doesn’t require us to believe in it, it is still true.

  I pray for our confused clergy friend on the right to life issue that one day he will hear the truth of the dignity and right to all life from conception until natural death throughout the entirity of life. I also pray for Obama to convet his heart for christ and our neighbors in the womb. Ave Maria +

  Thank you so much for you email blasts – you are on a righteous path to build family, faith, and life into the body of Christ. I love reading your spirtual and true messages.

  God bless,
  joe

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:17 pm.

• Fr. Leo,

  You couldn’t have voiced your opinion on the topic of abortion in any other way. We, as Catholics who believe in the Truth, are very grateful for Priests like you who speak the Truth.

  Please keep up your dedication to the Lord’s mission and if you care to post this note on your site, it would be fine with me, along with my name.

  God bless,
  Marlene

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:17 pm.

• Dear Father Leo,

  God bless you for having the courage to speak your heart on the abortion issue!! My husband and I looked for the Catholic Church to be more outspoken about electing people who are pro-abortion……but that speech never came. Instead, it was watered-down generalized paper hand-out inserted into the church bulletin. I think the church felt as though it should not get involved in politics. The church was silent for a long time during it’s sexual abuse scandal. I pray that it won’t remain silent again on this movement towards more abortions. Perhaps the church looks to avoid being critical as to avoid criticism of its own scandal. Whatever the motive……you are a breath of fresh air and a tribute to your calling. The church’s silence is reflected in the large number of Catholics who voted for President Obama.

  I am a grandmother. I had children in the 1960′s. I also had abortions. I can tell you that having a climate of permissiveness made my decision to have those abortions very easy. I was told that “it was the right thing to do”. I was very young and I had no idea what I was in for. No idea of the guilt and shame and regret for a lifetime. I am afraid that our newly elected politicians will make abortion like having a tooth pulled. God help us. We already have a climate of death. Our TV is full of vivid scenes of horrible things and people are becoming de-sensitized. To them, abortion is no big deal. Well it is a big deal. It is an innocent life. The political left is more interested in the rights of a terrorist than a tiny little baby.

  God has blessed me so very much. I have a wonderful husband, two grown and devoted children, and three beautiful grandchildren whom we adore. I don’t remember how I came upon your blog and newsletter but I am glad I did! You are very special. I also love to cook and my Italian background revolved around eating and talking at the kitchen table! God bless you again and keep up the good work. We need priests like you now more than ever.

  Sincerely,

  Maria
  PA

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:18 pm.

• Dear Fr. Leo,

  Thank you so much for this email. It made my day. I look forward to your emails all the time. You always take the words right out of my mouth. My parish did have a bus trip to DC for the march and boy was I grateful to be a part of it.

  There is so much evil going around that I’ve become more and more protective of my boys (9 and 7 yrs old) in the hope that they will not be affected. They go to a Catholic school but, sometimes, you feel that they are not in a Catholic school.

  If you haven’t recognized my name, I was the parent who wrote you a request (back in October) to come as a speaker in our school event. I apologize for not getting back to you for months. Unfortunately, the principal and the parents decided to look for someone local and less costly. However, I’ll definitely keep you in mind should there be another opportunity not in school because I will be homeschooling my boys next year, but, perhaps, in the parish.

  By the way, I’ve been meaning to tell you that my brother-in-law (Tom Lamar) is a good friend of Joe Campo of Grassroots Films. Imagine the pleasant surprise I had when you mentioned this in your newsletter about your trip to NY!

  Finally, I’m of Filipino descent born in Cebu. I remember my parents did know some Patalinghugs from Lapu-la pu I think it was. Is that where your family is from? Just curious.

  May God bless you always, Fr. Leo. Keep up that good fight for the Lord. We need more priests like you. You are in our prayers.

  In Jesus through Mary,
  Hazel
  NJ

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:19 pm.

• I know that I (along with countless others!) greatly appreciate Father’s staunch pro-life stance! He should not be discouraged from using strong language to condemn the evil of abortion because of a response such as the one he received from the other clergy member. Father’s words obviously struck a nerve, and I believe that is a good thing. Some things are too important to not state forcefully for fear of offending people. Although there is charity in not offending people needlessly, I believe the greater act of charity in this case is really driving the point home on the issue of abortion. Thanks to Grace Before Meals for its continuing great work.

  –Christopher

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:19 pm.

• Father Leo,

  Abortion is always a tough topic for discussion, and trying to sugar-coat the truth that it is the murder of an innocent child gets us nowhere.

  When my son and I discussed it prior to the Presidential Election, my first question to him was whether he supported the Constitution of the United States, which he said he did. I then asked him if he knew what rights he was guaranteed by the Constitution. His response was “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness”. I asked him to repeat it and then I again asked him what was the first word he said. He repeated “Life”. That being said, I asked how he could even consider supporting any candidate that would support abortion. This led to a very thoughtful discussion about the sanctity of life and his political views.

  What surprised me was that my son assumed that infants were being abandoned to orphanages and foster homes and were unwanted and unloved. I explained to him that there is no shortage of infertile couples who would love to take an infant into their home. My son asked why then there were so many older children in foster care or orphaned. I explained that sometimes through unfortunate circumstances in life, parents of older children either die or have addictions or circumstances which prevent them for caring for their children. Older children are harder to place in a family, but that doesn’t mean that they would have been better off not being born.

  I also made a commitment to my son that I would assist anyone he knew who was contemplating abortion. I promised that I would see that she received the care she needed to complete the pregnancy either by securing help through one of the many pro-life agencies in the area, or if necessary take the woman into our own home. I think the lack of support during unplanned pregnancies is what pushes so many women to abortion.

  Only by providing for their care and allowing for the placement of infants into loving homes will we be able to help turn the tide against abortion.

  Our biggest challenge is making everyone aware that there are alternatives and that one mistake need not lead to an even bigger one. May God bless you for the work you do to keep the lines of communication open.

  God bless.

  Alice

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:20 pm.

• Dearest Fr. Leo,

  I always welcome finding your weekly email blast in my inbox and was shocked to read that a clergyman would label your email blast of 1/28/09 “Street Talking” as “divisive” and “unhelpful”. I beg you not to change your holy boldness in preaching and teaching the truth. Our separated brethren could not bear to stand in the light of Christ that shines forth from you. I always find some jewel, some nugget of teaching in your blasts, so grateful to be receiving good food and not bland oatmeal, there is plenty of lukewarm, plain oatmeal to go around.

  There is quite a precedence for people leaving the table when the teachings got hard, I think so often of Jesus looking at Peter and asking him “Do you also want to leave” and Peter’s response “You have the words of eternal life”. Fr. Leo you are now the keeper of the Word of Eternal Life, may God continue to bless you with strength and courage….the Body of Christ needs you desperately.

  Our young son was secretly engaged at 18, married at 19, a father at 20 (the order of which was not proper) and now in the midst of a divorce at 21. The baby, a little girl named Clara lives with the mother in California. It is only the Church’s teaching on the sanctity of life that keeps us from grieving in despair. For through the Church and her shepherds we learn that all life is precious and that no, it is not better that Clara should never have been born. The world would have us believe that she will only suffer and be disadvantaged and our son penniless because of the support that he most rightly needs to provide. But Clara has life and where there is life there is hope. She now has the opportunity for Eternal life in the Trinity and our Church assures us that our Heavenly Father has a plan for her. We as grandparents, even though we probably shall never hold her again, have the privilege of doing spiritual warfare for Clara.

  I had someone ask me if the above situation had changed my mind on the Church’s teaching on contraception. I told them absolutely not. It has only strengthened my belief in how far we have strayed from the reality of our Father’s plan for us. It has strengthened my conviction that JP II’s Theology of the Body must be taught, must be shared. They thought I was nuts.

  I still have your prayer card from your first Mass on our cabinet and you are in my prayers on a daily basis. I am so grateful for the gift of your priesthood and your zeal for life.

  May God continue to bless you and pour out his Holy Spirit upon you,
  With much gratitude,
  Terri

  Posted by Fr. Leo on February 9th, 2009 at 1:21 pm.

• Thanks for your response to my e-mail. I was not familiar with his use of our money to pay for abortions in other countries (although, now that you mention it, I think you pointed it out in your blast), and I agree that is unacceptable. Though I had not considered it before, you are right that this use of taxpayer money along with the statement that no one is “pro-abortion” are seemingly contradictory. I can’t speak too much to that issue, since I am not very familiar with Obama’s policy or the decisions he has made and have not been able to find the information. I know he is very strongly in favor of the woman’s right to choose and vehemently against any attempt to overturn Roe v. Wade. As I mentioned in my previous e-mail, I too am against abortion. I am also cautious of the government intruding on and infringing on individual freedoms (although I agree that the right to murder should really not be a freedom that we are granted).

  I still support our president, although if he is supporting abortions in other parts of the world I find that hypocritical in light of his “anti-abortion” comments. I also still oppose abortion. As I mentioned previously, the ultimate support of our democracy is demonstrated in looking critically and, if necessary, speaking against those who make the decisions. Sadly, though I wouldn’t have a problem with the overturning of Roe v. Wade, I don’t see the abortion debate coming to an end anytime soon.

  Don’t misinterpret what I am saying to mean that I am in any way in favor of abortion. I am not. I cannot think of any instance, however tragic, where abortion should be considered a viable option. I oppose abortion in all instances. Despite that, however, I feel that the best thing for the country and the world is to support the man who was democratically elected President as the leader of the country and the free world. I feel that we do, however, have a responsibility as citizens of the United States to participate ACTIVELY in the governmental process. And I feel that responsibility extends far beyond stepping into the voting booth every 2 years. I applaud you and those who accompany you to pro-life rallies. Though it is not my personal issue (whether it should be or not is up for debate), I feel it is an important issue that needs to be kept on the table.

  Thank you again for all your insight and for stimulating the discussion on this and so many other critical issues facing our country and our world.

  Peace,
  Steve

  ——-
  Steve,

  Thanks for being part of the GBM Family. Please help us spread the message by encouraging family, friends and parishioners to sign up for the free weekly blasts.

  I appreciate your thoughts and I respect your opinions about President Obama. In my emails I am not trying to endorse or reject the Presidential powers. I left political science for a reason. It’s too corrupt!

  My mission is to call to the forefront the reality of evil in abortion. Diminishing the importance of this in anyway is liken to the boiling frog. If we put a frog in a boiling pot, it will jump out. But if you put the frog in cool water and slowly turn the heat up, it will eventually boil itself to death. That’s what’s happening to our country. We are becoming more and more accepting of immorality and a culture of death.

  My words are clearly in defiance to the almost “casual” approach the President is taking. My words are cold water on an issue that seems to fall on deaf ears. He lifted a ban so that now our tax money will fund abortions in other countries. Should that not outrage our citizens, especially in our current economic crisis?

  Honestly, the rest of Obama’s “political”decisions have very little impact on me. He can (and will) do whatever he wants when it comes to the war, economy, the ozone, or immigration.

  But as a leader of the Free Nation, he should be morally responsible that his decisions do not “offend” human life – which abortion does. When he says that no one should choose abortion, but then he uses tax payer money to pay for it in other countries what kind of signal does that send? Would we be happy if the President paid for the extermination of the Jews? People will say it’s not the same thing – but the dignity of life should be given to the baby in the mother’s womb. How would you describe Obama’s approach to abortion? He knows abortion is wrong, but yet supports it with his laws and tax payer money?

  I honestly think the best political decision he can make is to say that abortion will be kept legal but it must be paid for by the individuals who seek it, and other private (not federal) companies who believe in its the moral acceptability. The majority of abortions are committed out of convenience, not emergencies. He can even go so far as to say, while government cannot pay for abortions (due to the extreme divisions this issue causes), he will allow private companies to turn their services into a regular business, subject to governmental regulations to ensure “safety.”

  But, then, he cannot (nor should you) overlook how many women are left on their own to deal with the post traumatic abortion syndrome that is rampant! I know because I work with those women. Will he offer help to those women who have had abortions and are now psychologically and emotionally hurting? If not, why not? Doesn’t he want to make a wrong right?

  Our nation is unfortunately seemingly turning a blind eye to the problem of abortion in our country. We think there are other problems – bigger problems – in the world, like the ozone, war, and AIDS. BUT, when we kill our own babies, pay for it with tax payer money, and say that it’s not government’s responsibility to show a better way, then I believe we’re heading down a slope that will destroy America’s soul.

  I can’t convince you otherwise, but I do think that in the hierarchy of truths, the amount of support President Obama gives to abortion makes it very difficult for me to respect his leadership abilities.

  We must continue to pray for each other, our president, and especially our mothers of unborn babies.

  Peace!
  Fr. Leo

  Posted by Fr. Leo Patalinghug on February 11th, 2009 at 5:23 am.

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